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By kimber{D}
After a few attempts, a girl sets forth some thoughts for the "slave thought" as ordered by her Master. It is hard for kimber at this time, for she goes through a period of questioning herself. A girl is told that all slaves question themselves, indeed, even that all humans, at times, question themselves. A girl tries to take solace in this and remember who and what she is as taught by her Master.
The thing that keeps playing over and over in kimber's mind is the dedication and devotion that is required to keep your Master's collar in real life... and in virtual life. One thing that a girl sees so much of is the three to six week collar on irc. A girl does *not* seek to judge other girls, for she herself makes mistakes daily. What a girl does wish to share is that there *are* difficulties in this journey we are all making, but you can work them out. It is hard to please your Master all the time, though we strive. At times we will feel as if we are not adequately pleasing enough, sometimes the feeling is so strong that this girl feels that she is not worthy of her Master's collar.
A girl also gets frustrated and angry, enough so that at times she thinks she cannot continue, and the collar feels so heavy that it might drag her under, and she won't be able to get back up. At these times, kimber begs to communicate with her Master... begs to speak... if that fails, kimber begs to be allowed time to think, as obviously, a girl is forgetting how very precious her Master's collar is to her.
It can be said with honesty that it is not an easy life we live as slaves. kimber has cried more in the years that she has been learning about her slave belly than she has ever cried in her life. So many emotions... fear, pain, joy, extacy, devotion, love, anger. You fight your slave belly as long as you can, then you rejoice in surrendering to it, then you examine it again and again, question, and probe your heart and mind. It is not easy to give yourself up totally to the pleasure, the whim of a Man. It requires trust... trust that for some of us is so hard to believe in. A girl merely wishes to show that she has had such feelings... in hopes to encourage those who stumble like herself... you can trust... you can wear a collar for more than six weeks... you can surrender... it just takes time... courage... and most of all... trust.
kimber lost her collar once. Those few hours were the most excruiciating hours she has spent in her time as a slave. kimber felt lost, alone, small, scared, like a failure and very, very tortured. kimber lost her collar because she questioned. She questioned the will of her Master, she questioned herself as a slave to the point that she forgot what she was. kimber remembered quickly what she was when her collar was removed. When a girl begged to speak to her Master, luckily, He thought for some reason this girl was worth His time... and allowed it. No more will kimber forget her place or question His will. This collar that encircles her neck might take work, but the slave that wears it knows that it is worth the work it takes to bear it... and she is a lucky slave to have the time He gives her. kimber will not say it is easy, but she will say it is worth it... very much so... to hear Him call her "His girl".