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March 15 1998Over the course of the last 15 months, I have seen a great deal of change within my life, since being introduced to this philosophy that some people here actually strive to maintain and protect. Many of these changes would be difficult to really call "change" by definition. I think that the word "awakening" would be more apt in this case. I have always been what I am, and 15 months ago I stumbled into a forum where what I think and believe about how men and women should interact stood like an open door before me...
I was shown this place called IRC Gor, by a very close friend of mine, a woman with whom I had been spending a great deal of time with on IRC during the previous 9 months. I will admit that upon my first visit to the Silk&Steel those long months ago, I perceived that the people there had simply created an elaborate form of role-play based on the Gor series, (I had read 4 of the books 20 years previous... I was 15 at the time, and as a 15 year old I will admit that the "enslavement of women" was far from my mind, but Tarl Cabot was cool) and having grown bored with simple IRC, I was ready to jump in and play. Soon however, I began to learn it was entirely different...
What I began to see, and to understand, was that there are a *few* here who hold what it means to be Gorean in their hearts, and lives. I saw that this IRC fantasy Gorean role-play could be something more... something very real, and meaningful. No, I am not talking about being able to "play with the best of them", I am talking about reality. When I speak of reality in regards to myself, I speak of beliefs held in my mind and heart... beliefs shared by others of like mind who generally shun our modern feministic and "politically correct" society in search of a more biologically correct way of life, that if one has the courage to embrace and to sacrifice for, one can have beyond IRC. In short, I grew out of the generally meaningless and mindless role-play aspects of this online forum, and slowly began to search for something real...
My marriage, having been pretty much on the rocks long before discovering IRC Gor, continued to fail. At times I would discuss with my wife what seemed to be "coming out" of me, and she would see it as nothing but a game to be played at bedtime, and sought equality within it. Of course, I could in no way provide for her this equality she sought... it was, again, nothing but a game to her. To make that long story short, I continued to grow, and we grew further apart. I am sure there are many out there who will chastise, and scorn my decision to pursue what is within me to seek, at the expense of a marriage, a different lifestyle. Recall the mention of "sacrifice" for a moment. How could anyone who is reasonably sane seek to continue living a failing institution? Why go on for years, perhaps for a lifetimee, with unfulfilled needs and expectations? I made the decision. I sacrificed. We are both the better for it now.
I have been told that it is not possible to be Gorean, and that many people believe that one cannot be Gorean, without the experience of having a slave kneel at one's feet. Also, the reverse has been said... that one cannot be a slave until one is at the feet of her master. Is it so widely believed that living a lifestyle with such beliefs is solely based on slavery? From my observations I would say it is sadly so. From what is commonly said, I would have to assume that, according to others, I will not be Gorean until kimber kneels at my feet. It may be that these others simply do not have the capacity to accept, or administer *real* control in this forum called IRC. I do not need my slave at my feet to control her. Nor does she need to be at my feet to experience deep feelings of being owned. However, the time approaches, slowly and responsibly, sacrifices being made on both sides to achieve what we need to have in our lives.
I would like to point out a *fact* for you book dwellers... Only 1 out of 40 women on Gor were slaves, on the average, in most cities. Now, if we assume that the world of Gor was equally populated with both men and women, this would indicate a ratio of about one slave for every 40 freemen, even taking into account the existence of male slaves. If we are to believe the tales from many who dwell here on IRC, and assume that one needs to own a slave to be Gorean, we might also assume that only one of forty men on Gor within the books were really Gorean, eh? A foolish notion. I hope that this example would serve to say that there are many other things which encompass the idea of being Gorean than the simple enslavement of females.
Continuing on, I have seen a great many people here, claiming to be of one particular Gorean city, or another, I have also done that in the past. But as the need for the role-play decreased, so did the need for being thought of as belonging to a Gorean city. It is really not important anymore to me. What is important are the relationships I have with my few friends, and my slaves. These relationships are not based on role-play in the slightest. They are very real, and meaningful, and pleasing. Considering what the newcomer to IRC Gor is now presented with, it is very surprising that even a few of them actually make it when placed among the myriad role-play games here. I sat in amusement one night this last week, as I was scorned for admitting that I was "American", after a few had proclaimed that they were "Tuchuk". Indeed, I was even set upon by a "Ubar" :) No, it is not surprising that so many are utterly lost in their little fantasy world of IRC Gor. And *I* am told that I am not real? Think about it... With such attention to detail practiced in regards to "what the books tell us", and "Tarl did this" and "Kamchak did that" and "Elinor was like this" etc. etc. ad infinitum, I no longer have to wonder who are the real ones here...
The real ones are those people who do not seek to be something they are not. The real ones are those who do not act differently here, than they are. The real ones are those who do not do anything here, they would not do in reality. Those, in my sometimes not so humble opinion, are the *real* Goreans. Those are the people who have better things to do, *real* relationships, whether here, or in their lives that practice the Gorean philosophy, than to become so steeped in the role-play of Gor, that they forget that they are quite firmly, and probably fortunately for most, planted on this polluted and dying old planet Earth. I suppose that for those without the courage to seek the deeper meaning, it will simply be their escape from their reality, whatever it is. That is their choice, not mine. I will continue my journey, for it is what I am. I have no choice anymore.... I wish you well, Goreans A quote from Blood Brothers of Gor, pages 45 to 46, which I find of interest:
This is analogous to the secret slaveries which sometimes exist on Earth, where a woman, returning home, kneels and waits to be collared. How startled would be the fellows in the office to discover that that trimly figured, luscious coworker of theirs, to them seemingly so cool, aloof and inaccessible, is at home another man's slave. Too, how startled would be the women in certain neighborhoods, or in certain organizations and groups, to discover that one of their most prominent neighbors, or prominent members, is, in the privacy of her own dwelling, a slave. Alerted by a code word in a seemingly innocent phone call, she prepares herself for her master. She bathes herself and combs herself. She makes herself up. She applies perfume. When he arrives home she is awaiting him, naked, kneeling, on the slave mat, at the foot of his bed, her collar before her. "Greetings, Master," she says. She then lifts the collar in her teeth, that he may put it on her.